Here is the reason why I've been a bad blogger. The first trimester tiredness is no joke!
I cannot tell you how absolutely thrilled I am to become a mother for the second time come early December. It's no secret that Motherhood is my absolute favorite thing....ever! Though I honestly never thought I would be here, married with a toddler that keeps me on my toes at all times and one sweet little bundle on the way. I though I would forever be a nomad going wherever my feet lead me. I never thought that I would be led through life by tiny little hands that I had a part in creating. Its the sweetest joy, and the biggest blessing.
Watching Elly's sweet babyness fade away as she starts walking and the rolls begin quietly disappearing, makes me a little teary eyed. As I watch my little girl, my first born, grow into the little person she's destine to become, I cant help but rejoice in the fact that she chose me to be her mother. Though she'll always be my baby, I'm starting to miss those early morning infant stretches, first noises, and midnight feedings. She started weening herself a few months back, though she still nurses on occasion, it has become far and few between, which makes my heart ache a little.
With Elly, pregnancy seemed to drag on an on and on... but this second time around, my goodness, where has the time gone? I blinked and I was 16 weeks pregnant. I need more time, time to prepare, time to digest the fact that all too soon we'll be a family of four, and I may never figure out how to get out of the house in under an hour, or ever. Time to figure out how I can possibly love a second as much as I love the first, or how I will ever take a nap again. Or how on earth you manage to go to the grocery store with two kids, what if they both want to get in the cart?? I know in time the knowledge will come, the naps will return, and I will in fact figure out how to do all this. Right mamas?
For now, I'm going to enjoy every God given second of this pregnancy, this time where we are one in the same. This time where every flutter and every hiccup stops me in my tracks and makes me smile. This time where I lay awake at night wondering what you'll look like, or who you'll take after. Dreaming of you and your sister playing together, loving each other, something I never experienced as an only child. I cannot wait, our little Christmas baby, you are the sweetest gift.